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The "Big 3" of Children's Ministry
The goal of children's ministry, of course, is to impact the lives of children toward a personal, vital, and growing relationship with Christ. Activity oriented ministry is certainly one way to accomplish this, however a comprehensive ministry to children must look beyond the activities to new and creative ways to accomplish the ultimate goal of impacting the lives of children.
An effective ministry to children will be threefold. These can be referred to as the "Big 3" of children's ministry.
1. Parents
These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. (Deuteronomy 6:6-7)
Any effective ministry to children will address the needs of parents or whoever is the primary caregiver of the children. Addressing their needs means equipping them to be better, godly parents. "Parents have more influence than anyone else on the their children's faith."1 A study by George Barna2 reveals that a majority of parents say that they are struggling to create the type of spiritual family relationship that they desire. These parents admit that the church is trying to provide them with useful information on
parenting, but something is still missing. To be effective in children's ministry, the church must discover what is missing in parenting today and seek to develop strong and godly families. Whether parents intend this or not, the home is "the single most powerful arena on earth to change a life for God."3 A child gains his understanding of God and establishes a belief system based on the actions and attitudes of his parents. So a parent can be a positive influence as well as a negative influence. The church must be prepared to equip parents to train their children as God intended.
What is it that parents are looking for from the church? According to research from the Barna Group, parents want seven items from their church4:
1. A Safety Net-Parents want support in a family crisis.
2. A Process for Building Foundations in Their Children's Lives-Parents want to build self-esteem, moral values, and emotional stability into the lives of their children and they need guidance in doing so.
3. Specific Parenting Skills-Parents want guidance in becoming effective, godly parents.
4. Lifestyle Changes-Parents want help in determining what is vital to their family and then assistance in prioritizing those elements.
5. Emotional Support for Day-to-Day Issues-Parents want a support system to rely and lean on.
6. Reliable Advisor-Parents desire non-critical mentors that can be honest and objective about their parenting skills.
7. A True Partnership in Marriage-Parents want help in defining each persons role in raising a family.
Churches must take the initiative and help equip parents to be the godly spiritual leaders that they desire to be. Parents want to be a positive influence on their children, but many times do not know how to do it biblically. What better platform for equipping parents than through the children's ministry.
2. Teachers
And the things you have heard me say in the presence of many witnesses entrust to reliable men who will also be qualified to teach others. (2 Timothy 2:2)
A second area of concern in children's ministry is the motivation and equipping of teachers. Qualifications of a great teacher of children include godliness, dependability, the ability to communicate to children, loyalty, persistence, flexibility, and the ability to love. Although these qualities exist in many people, a true leader in children's ministry will guide teachers to use and better develop them. When developing teachers for children's ministry, three areas should be addressed:
1. Spiritual Development-"Those who commit their time and energy to developing spiritual maturity in others should not have to do so at the expense of their own growth."5 Leaders should provide opportunities for teachers to grow spiritually. These opportunities could be through devotional materials, sermon tapes, occasional sabbaticals, regular Bible studies, or opportunities to attend an adult Sunday school or worship service at regular intervals. A teacher who fails to continue growing spiritually will be ineffective and becomes more of a hindrance than an asset.
2. Teacher Training-Teachers need to be equipped to work with children. Keep in mind that at different ages children learn differently, so training should be age specific. Teacher training should be viewed as a three phase process6:
a. Phase 1-Identifying people who have a heart for reaching and teaching children.
b. Phase 2-Screening teachers to place them where they are most gifted.
c. Phase 3-Train teachers in proper teaching techniques, curriculum, evangelism, etc. Teachers are the backbone of an effective children's ministry. Keep in mind that it is the teachers that will ultimately make the difference between a good ministry and a great ministry to children. Prepare teachers to develop a great ministry by adequately training them to work with children.
3. Teacher Encouragement-Even though the work the teachers do is eternally important, many churches view the children's ministry as non-essential. "Even parents are inclined to view children's programs as mere baby-sitting."7 Because of the lack of encouragement within a local congregation, teaching children can be one of the loneliest places to serve God. Therefore, an effective leader will do everything possible to appreciate and encourage teachers. A few ways to encourage teachers are, regular recognitions from the pulpit, appreciation banquets, teaching certificates and awards, assigning new teachers to a mentor, and regular notes and gifts of appreciation. One creative way to encourage teachers is to ask them to commit to teach for only one year. Many times teachers are recruited and feel locked into a position for eternity. Giving them a way out if they are unhappy with the work relieves a lot of stress and creates a happier teaching force. Appreciating and encouraging the teachers increase the probability that they will stay committed to the task of teaching and reaching the children.
Many times the importance of teacher growth and development is overlooked within a children's ministry. However, a ministry that will devote time to the teachers will reap the benefits of being stronger, unified, and more effective.
3. Children
Jesus said, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these." (Matthew 19:14)
A third and final aspect of a children's ministry is, of course, the children. Driving factors for a children's ministry include the following:
1. Children are created in the image of God. (Genesis 1:27)
2. Children can have a part in the Kingdom of God. (Matthew 18:4)
3. Children are entrusted to us by God. (Proverbs 22:6)
4. Children are highly impressionable. (Matthew 18:6)
As one can see, working with children is a high calling from God and must be taken seriously. Children, like adults, are human beings, and all humans respond best in relational settings. Therefore, great effort must be given to developing relationships with the children. This can be accomplished by learning basic facts about the children. Facts such as the children's names, their home situations, and their parents are important elements of a child's life. When teachers and leaders know these things, children sense that they are truly cared for by the church. A child becomes more teachable when he or she knows they are cared for and loved. Children are spiritual beings as well as human beings. God desires to be in a personal relationship with every child in your ministry.
For that reason, every activity planned for children through the platform of the church must be intentional in pointing children toward that relationship. Activities that are enticing because they are fun may draw crowds, but have no place in the church if no spiritual impact is intended. This does not mean that church activities for children should not be fun. They can be, but the ultimate focus must be spiritual. The objective of the ministry must be to do everything possible at all times to point the children toward Jesus Christ. This is the only way to have a true relationship with God. This takes time, planning, and much work, but is necessary to effectively communicate God's love to children.
God expects a lot from the leaders of a children ministry. The leader's job is to develop and plan a ministry that is effective in reaching and teaching children. To accomplish this, three essential areas must be addressed: the parents, the teachers, and the children themselves. A ministry that is well balanced in these areas will have a great impact on a community for Christ. As a result, lives will be changed and the Kingdom will be enlarged.
"When a boy or girl thrusts his small hand into yours, it may be smeared with chocolate ice cream, or grimy from petting a dog. There may be a wart under the right thumb and a bandage around the little finger. But the important thing about his hand is that it is the hand that some day may hold a Bible or a Colt revolver; play a piano or spin a gambling wheel; gently dress a leper's wound or tremble wretchedly, uncontrolled by an alcoholic mind. Right now, that hand is yours . . . it asks for help and guidance."8
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1Roehlkepartain, Jolene, L., ed. Children's Ministry That Works: The Basics and Beyond. Group Publishing, Inc., Colorado Springs, CO. 1993. p. 46.
2Barna, George. Ministering to the Family: The Foundation of a Spiritual Revolution. A video seminar.
3 Wilkinson, Bruce. The Prayer of Jabez. Multnomah Publishers, Inc. Sisters, OR. 2000. p. 32.
4Barna, George. Ibid.
5Choun, Robert, J. and Michael S. Lawson. The Christian Educator's Handbook on Children's Ministry.
Baker Books, Grand Rapids, MI. 1998. p. 275.
6"You Wanna Voulnteer? Take a Number!" Children's Ministry Magazine. September/October 2000. p. 42.
7Choun, Robert J. and Michael S. Lawson. Ibid. p. 272.
8Author Unknown. Quoted by George B. Eager. How to Succeed in Winning Children to Christ. The
Mailbox Club. Valdosta, GA. 1979. p.1. |
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